| This is the story of a Erika, a poor, young girl, and her Thanksgiving:
I shaved turkey legs for 18 hours on Thursday, just to pay for the box I live in. Then I had to pick through the LMH cafeteria trash to pay for liposuction for Kush's sheep.
Then I got locked in a meat freezer. The tears I was crying from the toxic fumes in the meat freezer froze on my face and snapped my eyelashes off.
After digging through the metal wall of the freezer with the pair of chopsticks I made from my eyelashes, I crawled over a pile of unwashed Amish men just to get to route 30.
While crawling down Route 30, I saw several "Wanted" signs with my picture on them, with a $0.75 reward. The name under the picture, however, was "Jerry."
After I lost my right arm, left leg, and right butt cheek to frostbite, I managed to crawl in through the doggie-door into my garage. My brother, who had been peeling potatoes to keep the communists away, saw me and called animal control.
Please, if you read this, come and get me out of the animal shelter, or at least have the heart to adopt me. Don't leave me in my small, 2 X 2 foot kennel.
Love, Erika |
